Guys! Guys! Hey, you guys! It’s Wednesday, which means it’s time for some Wednesday Cute!!!

My Modern Met has assembled a collection of animals and their mini-mes! That’s right: There are animals that are adorable in their own right, accompanied by their adorable, smaller doppelgangers! Folks, we’ve got proof positive of Cute Overload’s Rule of Cuteness #7: A thing, accompanied by a smaller version of that thing, is always cute.

• And a bonus item: From the Huffington Post come these adorable kids’ letters to the Tooth Fairy, in which they express their hopes, their fears—and their desire for more cash. Dream big, kids!

—Avery, who thinks the ultimate pairing would be a tiny turtle with its even tinier turtle twin. 2 cute 2 handle!!!

Olympics! Olympics Olympics Olympics!! Aaaaaahhhh London 2012!!!

If you’re anything like us, your every waking moment over the past week has been consumed by thoughts of the Olympics: the races! the medals! Her Majesty skydiving! But you might have missed this: an adorable short film by Amael Isnard and Leo Bridle in which the vermin—ahem, excuse me, urban animals of London carry their own tiny Olympic torch through the streets. It’ll make you see rats in a different light (i.e. a cute one). (Via The Mary Sue)
[vimeo]http://vimeo.com/46296980[/vimeo]

• Excuse us, CNN, but why are you asking if the Olympic mascots are “cute or creepy”? Wenlock and Mandeville—yes, those are their names—were forged out of steel and rainbows. STEEL AND RAINBOWS, people! We all know the answer to their question is “absolutely adorable.” And if you don’t think a big-headed alien-type-thing can be cute, we implore you to watch E.T. immediately.
• Over at her blog, Katie Workman, author of The Mom 100 Cookbook, writes about making food for two young boys who aren’t always that easy to please (and what kids are?). But this week the tables turned, when her son Jack and his friend Aaron made breakfast for the whole family—specifically, popovers. This blog post has the double-whammy of cute kids and adorable little puffed breakfast pastries. Yum!

What with the rumor-mongering and mud-slinging that’s so prevalent in contemporary politics, we wouldn’t be surprised if all this election talk was getting you down. Luckily we have the solution: Kid President! This little POTUS knows what’s what, and he can also seriously cut a rug. Plus, he’s wise beyond his years: “If it doesn’t make the world better, don’t do it.” You’ve got our vote, Kid President!
[youtube]http://youtu.be/7bW7s98R088[/youtube]

•  On the one hand, this story about bears in Bearsville invading a home multiple times while the owners were out is scary. It’s sad that their kitchen was ransacked, although fortunately nobody was hurt. On the other hand, you adorable silly bears!! We know you probably got confused because you live in Bearsville, NY, but that’s not your house!! (Via Stephen Colbert)
• If we’re going to blog about cute things we might as well include this link to a piece on the origin of the word “cute.” It even has a totally cute graph.

We’re suckers for a cute animal video, and goats rank SUPER high on the hierarchy of animal adorability. Need proof? This tiny goat is doing parkour—off her friend’s back.
[youtube]http://youtu.be/5IuRzJRrRpQ[/youtube]

• Speaking of cute animal videos, enjoy these kittens drinking from tiny bottles. You win again, Cute Overload!!

—Avery, who’s off to practice some parkour

I should warn: This is a bit of a selfish blog post. Seeing as I will be starting college this fall, I have been gathering as much information as I can about classes, activities, social life, etc. Unfortunately, this means that I spend an unhealthy amount of time on College Confidential and Rate My Professor. This obsession is also why a book entitled College in a Nutskull caught my eye while I was perusing the book room a few days ago. If you’re not familiar with this book, it is essentially a compilation of hilarious factual errors and is quite simply, sublime.

As funny as this book is, I had expected a how-to book and was surprised when it turned out not to be. So I figured, why not seek how-to advice about college from Workman people? The following is a short list of great advice. You may not be in college anymore but hopefully you find this pertinent to some aspect of your life (for example, knowing how to do laundry is very important).

Some wise nuggets:

I think anyone would agree—this is sound advice. Workman people must be pretty smart!

Also recommended to me for my college transition were The College Cookbook  and The Girl’s Guide to Absolutely Everything, which may conveniently go missing right around the time I leave Workman for school this fall…

 -Zatio (Rising Frosh)

SHARE A PHOTO OF YOUR DOG IN GLASSES for a chance to win a signed copy of Arlo Needs Glasses by Barney Saltzberg. Whether or not your dog has fuzzy vision, we are positive he will look just as smart as Arlo in a pair of snazzy frames.

To enter the “My Dog Needs Glasses!” Pinterest contest, follow these steps:

1)      Follow Workman Publishing on Pinterest (so you can vote and enter the contest).

2)      Pin a photo of your dog wearing glasses on your personal Pinterest with the hashtag #ArloNeedsGlasses (to help us track entries). You can pin to win between June 25 and July 31!

3)      Vote on your favorite photos with repins and likes.

We’ll pin photos to the official “My Dog Needs Glasses!” board. The five photos with the most likes and re-pins by July 31st will win an autographed copy of Arlo Needs Glasses. Entrants must be U.S. residents.

Contest opens Monday, so start scheming now (copious treats recommended.)

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NuDPB_fBW3c[/youtube]

Arlo Needs Glasses (Workman Publishing, July 1, 2012, Hardback, $15.95, Ages 3+, ISBN 9780761168799) is an interactive children’s title by bestselling author Barney Saltzberg, chock full of pop-up features and try-on glasses. Arlo Needs Glasses introduces a shaggy, free-spirited dog who loves to play catch – until one day, he can’t see the ball anymore. He needs glasses! Arlo Needs Glasses playfully demystifies the eye doctor experience, allaying anxiety in kids who are about to enter the world of glasses – which among other things, help them become better readers.

Barney is the author-illustrator of Beautiful Oops!, the successful Kisses series, Peekaboo, Crazy Hair Day, and Good Egg, as well as many other beloved children’s books. Also a singer-songwriter, he has written tunes for the PBS show “Arthur” and continues to perform music for children. He lives in Los Angeles with his wife and two dogs. You can follow him on Twitter @BSaltzberg.

ATTN bloggers! If you love dogs, glasses, and/or the combo of dogs & glasses, please feel free to share this contest: http://www.workman.com/blog/?p=16100

OFFICIAL MY DOG NEEDS GLASSES CONTEST RULES
NO PURCHASE NECESSARY TO ENTER OR WIN. VOID OUTSIDE THE FIFTY UNITED STATES AND WHERE PROHIBITED. ALL CONTEST ENTRIES ARE SUBJECT TO THE OFFICIAL RULES WHICH GOVERN ALL ASPECTS OF PARTICIPATION AND PRIZE AWARD.

ELIGIBILITY:

Entrants must be legal U.S. residents. Employees of Workman Publishing Co., Inc. and their respective parents, subsidiaries, affiliates, advertising and promotion agencies, promotional partners, and the immediate families of each living in the same household are not eligible to enter.

By accepting a prize, winner (and parent or legal guardian, if applicable) agrees to release and hold harmless Workman Publishing Co., Inc. and each of their parents, affiliates, subsidiaries, and directors, officers, attorneys, employees and agents from any all damage, injury, death, loss or other liability of any kind that may arise from or in connection with his or her acceptance of a prize awarded.

HOW TO ENTER:
To enter, take a photo of your dog wearing glasses and pin your photo to your  Pinterest  board with the hashtag: #ArloNeedsGlasses  and follow Workman (www.pinterest.com/workmanpub) between June 25, 2012, 12:00:01 a.m. (Eastern Time) and July 31, 2012, 11:59:59 (Eastern  Time). Photos will be repinned onto the “My Dog Needs Glasses board.

We encourage you to be silly, but not put your dog through too much embarrassment.

For purposes of these rules, “receipt” of an electronic entry occurs when Sponsor’s servers record the entry information upon clicking the “submit” (or similar) button. In the event of a dispute as to the identity of the entrant, the entrant will be deemed to be the individual who is the registered holder of the email account. All entries must include your name and e-mail address. Incomplete entries will be voided.

PRIZES:Five Prize Winners will each receive an autographed copy of the book ARLO NEEDS GLASSES by Barney Saltzberg.

SELECTION:
The five photos with the most “likes” and re-pins” will be declared he winning entries.

NOTIFICATION:
Winners will be notified on their Pinterest posts by August 3, 2012. If potential winner cannot be reached or does not acknowledge notification within five (5) days of first notification attempt, the prize will be forfeited and the next photo with the most likes  and re-pins will be selected as a potential  Prize Winner.

CONDITIONS OF PARTICIPATION:
By entering or accepting a prize in this contest, the winners ( and parent or legal guardian, if applicable) agree to be bound by these Official Rules, and to conform to all federal, state, and local laws and regulations.  There are no prize substitutions, transfers, or cash equivalents permitted.

SPONSOR OWNERSHIP OF ENTRIES:
All entries submitted will become the property of  Workman Publishing Co. Inc., and will not be returned to anyone. As such, they can be used on books and calendars published by Workman Publishing Co., Inc. or licensed to third parties by Workman Publishing Co., Inc. without specific permission or compensation. Efforts will be made to credit the contributor by name when possible. If you prefer to remain anonymous, please let us know when you make your submission.

RESERVATION OF RIGHTS:
Sponsor is not responsible for (a) incorrect or inaccurate entry of information by entrants; late, lost, garbled, misdirected, incomplete, or damaged entries or transmissions caused by interrupted or unavailable network, server or other connections; scrambled transmissions or other errors or problems of any kind whether mechanical, human, or electronic, technical malfunctions of the computer hardware, software, or any combination thereof; or problems associated with any virus or any other damage caused to entrants’ systems; (b) any Contest disruptions, injuries, losses, or damages caused by events beyond the control of Sponsor; or c) any printing or typographical errors in any materials associated with this Contest.

Sponsor reserves the right to cancel, terminate or modify this Contest in the event that this Contest is not capable of being conducted or completed as planned for any reason including, without limitation, as a result or computer virus(es), bugs, tampering, or technical failures of any kind. If the Contest is cancelled or terminated, notification will be posted at www.barbecuebible.com. In the event that an individual attempts to undermine the legitimate operation of this Contest Sponsor, in addition to disqualifying such person from in this Contest, reserves the right to seek damages and all other available remedies (whether at law or in equity) against him or her.

DISPUTE RESOLUTION:
By entering, participant waives all rights to claim punitive, incidental and consequential damages, attorneys’ fees or any damages other than actual out-of-pocket costs or losses that may arise in connection with participation in the Contest or acceptance, possession and use of any prize Except where prohibited, by participating, you agree that a) any and all disputes, claims and causes of action arising out of or connected with this Contest shall be resolved individually, without resort to any form of class action, b) any and all claims, judgments and awards shall be limited to actual out-of-pocket costs incurred, including costs associated with participating, but in no event attorney’s fees; and c) under no circumstances will any participant be permitted to obtain awards for and hereby waives all rights to claim punitive, incidental and consequential damages and any other damages, other than for actual out-of-pocket expenses, and any and all rights to have damages multiplies or otherwise increased.

WHO WON:
Any mailed requests to receive the list of prize winners must be sent to Workman Publishing, My Dog Needs Glasses Contest Winners, 225 Varick Street, New York, NY 10014, no later than August 31, 2012 and must be accompanied by a self-addressed, stamped envelope.

SPONSOR:

Workman Publishing Co., Inc., 225 Varick Street, New York, NY 10014

We at the Workman Blog love to celebrate writers of all kinds, but particularly those with vibrant, eccentric lives outside of their literary pursuits. So when it came time to write a blog post in celebration of National Poetry Month (it’s April!), we knew there was only one place to turn for poets whose first calling isn’t necessarily words: celebrities.

The Anthology of Really Important Modern Poetry is just that: a collection of “poems” by some of the preeminent public speakers of our day, from Charlie Sheen to Sarah Palin and everyone in between. Below, some choice examples of brilliant verse…by people who really should learn to think before they speak.

 ”After Winning an Oscar for the Film Titanic,” by James Cameron

This is for a real event that happened when real people died
and shocked the world in 1912 and I’d like…
to do a few seconds of silence
in remembrance of 1,500 men, women and children who died.
You really made this a night to remember in every way.
Now let’s party ’til dawn!

“My Recipe for Raising Kids,” by Ivana Trump

My recipe for raising kids:
I encourage my children to try new things.

As much as I tell them they can do anything,
I don’t want them to engage in pastimes that have no future.

xxxxxThe other day, Ivanka came to me and said
xxxxxshe wanted to enroll one afternoon in field hockey.
xxxxxI said,
xxxxx“Ivanka, that’s a boy’s sport. There’s no future in it for you.”

If Ivanka wanted to do karate, fine.
Field hockey she doesn’t need.
Golf, I think, is a perfect sport, but fencing? I’d say,
xxxxx“Kid, don’t waste your time.”

Ice skating is great exercise and it’s social.
xxxxxYou won’t get many phone calls to play field hockey,
xxxxxbut ice skating you can do in New York
xxxxxat the beautiful Wollman Rink in Central Park
xxxxxwhich their father and I rebuilt during our marriage.

—————————————————————————————————–

The Anthology of Really Important Modern Poetry was curated by Kathryn and Ross Petras and is on sale now. Visit the Petrases at their website, Stupidest.com, and follow them on Twitter @TeamStupidest.

It’s Leap Day! That magical day that comes only once every four years, when we get to make up for the fact that it actually takes the Earth 365 and a quarter days to revolve around the sun by tacking a whole extra day onto the end of February. (Happy birthday, Jerry Gergich!)

In keeping with Leap Day tradition, we here at Workman are celebrating by:

1. taking leaps—i.e. doing things we wouldn’t usually do.
2. taking leaps—i.e. jumping over one another like frogs.

But—sorry—we’re not about to show you footage of us leap frogging around the office. So instead, check out these champion Leap Froggers! Eric and Ryan Buffet of Aiken, South Carolina, broke the world record for Most Tandem Leap Frogs in 30 Seconds. The previous record, set by two unknown jumpers at Burning Man, was 25. We think Leap Day William would be proud!

To read about more amazing records, pick up a copy of The Record Setter Book of World Records. And to find more records that are just itching to be broken, visit RecordSetter.com.

Dear Yesterday’s Love,

We feel your pain. Valentine’s Day can be full of unwelcome sappiness and anguish. Who are you, fat flying archer baby, to force love upon the lonely, the single, the freshly dumped?

Nevermind those ruddy cheeks. We have an excerpt from the perfect book to cheer you. Dear Old Love: Anonymous Notes to Former Crushes, Sweethearts, Husbands, Wives & Ones That Got Away is here for you to confide in, to let you know that it could have been (much, much) worse, or, if you’re in the throes of romance, to remind you how lucky you are.

Here are some wise words–funny and bittersweet and sad–from those who survived to tell the tale. Get ready to ease that heartache.

The Real Ending

Dear Old Love,
I knew it was over when…

• the back rubs tapered off to one every three years.
• you got back into the car with all that beef jerky.
• you used the recession as an excuse to stop going to the movies.
• you said the secret to a long marriage was freedom.
• you got the call about your father. I’m not good with bad times.
• you started secretly making copies of my recipes.
• you claimed to have outgrown dirty limericks.
• you no longer looked me in the eyes on video chat.
• you quit straining the pulp from my orange juice.
• I saw his silver Audi in front of your place. Good-bye, and thanks for slumming.
• you gave up cunnilingus for Lent.
• your mom yelled at me for not knowing who Rebecca from the Bible was. With the way she was talking I thought this Rebecca was a neighbor of yours.
• you had a second kid. Through marriage and kid #1, I figured I still had a shot.
• you stopped being real and started being polite.
• I started living vicariously through your infidelities.
• you didn’t pay for my dinner. For the two-hundred-and-fiftieth time.
• you stopped hoisting me up onto your shoulders at outdoor concerts.
• you quit wanting to coordinate our Halloween costumes.
• you wept and said you no longer loved me.

But, Alas…

Dear Old Love,
I only regret…

• that we turned back before we got to the Grand Canyon
• haranguing you about wearing jeans too often and dresses not often enough. (Still–wear more dresses!)
• my refusal to accept your leaving with dignity and grace, even if pouting and rage have their own grace.
• comparing you to all those main characters in Billy Joel songs.
• balking on our trip to India.
• having an affair when I didn’t even like the other one that much.
• that I made you turn off the lights the last time.
• portioning out sex like you were a dog in need of treats, even if you were a dog in need of treats.
• not mercy-killing our marriage sooner.
• saying “Don’t flatter yourself!” so many times during our breakup.
• not seeing the look on the next sucker’s face when he finds out.
• asking you how you got your burn.
• being too timid to do Ecstasy with you. Now I know–you’re never too old.
• not enjoying your tantrums when I had the chance.
• we were not sixty years older when we met. Our age difference would seem negligible, plus you would not be able to get away so easily.
• turning you on to yoga, and yoga instructors.
• my last five drunken e-mails.
• not ceding control of the remote more often.
• being able to dish it out but not take it.
• not recognizing how ahead of your time you were.
• never letting you see me cry.

Don’t you feel better? Now maybe it’s time to take up archery for yourself.

In the summer of 2011, several cartoonists from The New Yorker magazine were invited to participate in a group therapy session. Let’s just say it did not go well….

A little bit dark, a little bit twisted, a little bit weird, a little bit dumb, and little bit naughty (who wants to give all the nice presents around the holidays anyway?) — from cartoonist Matthew Diffee, it’s the absolutely brilliant Best of the Rejection Collection, the funniest cartoons you’ll never see in The New Yorker.

And, it can all be yours! We’re giving away one copy of the book, signed by author Matt Diffee and several of his colleagues and co-stars from the trailer above. Just leave a comment below or at the Workman  Facebook page telling us about a holiday gift that you rejected (aka returned for something way cooler). Each person is allowed two entries (one in each comment section!). The giveaway will be closed and a winner will be chosen at random at noon EST on Wednesday December 14, 2011.

Now that Thanksgiving’s over and the family has scattered  (at least for now), there’s a good chance they somehow manage not to feel so far away. Between FaceTime, Skype, email, and other modern modes of conversation, it’s fairly likely you’re not missing a beat — either you’re texting them or, more likely, they’re texting you. So, in celebration of this in-between holiday time and the When Parents Text blog’s 1^st year anniversary (a holiday in itself!), we present you with this lovely video:

[vimeo]http://vimeo.com/31610446[/vimeo]

Hey, visitors to and residents of New York City! What if I told you that I can get your beautiful mug on TV sets all across the nation? And what if I told you that not only would your face would be adorned with a sweet fake mustache, but that you’d be helping to set a world record?

It’s true! This Thursday, November 10, join Dan Rollman and Corey Henderson, authors of The RecordSetter Book of World Records, plus dozens of other RecordSetters as they set the world record for Most People Wearing a Fake Mustache While Watching the Live Broadcast of a Morning Show. Aspiring RecordSetters should show up at 7 a.m. at the corner of 44th Street and Broadway, outside the set of Good Morning America. We’ll position ourselves behind the big glass windows so people all across America can watch as we make history.

What do you need to participate? Just yourself, a fake mustache, and a camera-grabbing orange T-shirt—so the folks at home are sure to see you. No orange shirt? Just show up and we can provide one. And there’s no need to invest in a fancy ‘stache, either: An eyeliner pencil or even a (non-toxic!) marker can get the job done.

The RecordSetter's toolkit

For inspiration, I offer this related record: Most People Wearing Fake Mustaches in a Book.

Check out lots more World Records at the RecordSetter website, where you can brag about records you’ve set and find others that are just begging to be broken. And follow @RecordSetter on Twitter for up-to-date record-setting info. See you bright and early on Thursday!