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Free Yourself from the Traps of a Narcissistic World

By Daryl Van Tongeren

We have become a polarized country, divided along politics, culture, race, religion, and ideals. To add to this, over the last fifty years, narcissism has increased drastically. Individualistic nations—and specifically newer generations—are trending toward a more self-focused lifestyle. The modern mindset has been driven inward—we prioritize ourselves and our desires above all others. Yet, in times of crisis, it’s more important than ever to turn outward—to cultivate empathy and inclusion. Humble is the antidote to a self-centered world and will help us rebuild ties with other people, despite our differences. The ancient virtue of humility can help us relate to others across political and cultural divides and help us focus on what we have in common rather than what sets us apart.

With over a decade of empirical research, Daryl Van Tongeren explores an undervalued character trait and shows us that, by cultivating a more humble disposition, we can increase happiness, strengthen relationships, and achieve professional success, all while crafting lives of meaning and purpose. He’s created a step-by-step road map that requires just three methods to achieving better humility: accepting feedback, reducing defensiveness, and building empathy. Being able to put yourself in other people’s shoes and listen without closing yourself off are the most powerful tools we have in closing the gaps defined by our dissimilarities.

Humility is an open door to better relationships and reinvigorated social lives at home and at work. No matter your beliefs or religious background, humility is a valuable and applicable trait, teaching you to recognize what you’re good at—and that having an accurate view of yourself is key in every human connection. Van Tongeren brings to the page more than just tolerance. He leads us to an active valuation of differences and shares how seeking honesty, opening our minds to different perspectives, and building compassion are the paths we should all be on.

This often-overlooked trait has the power to change our lives and our world.

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Daryl Van Tongeren

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Publication date
May 24, 2022